As luck would have it, the LLDD-Hyphen-L's work took her back-to-back to two of Britain's most famous offshore destinations - the Isle of Man and the Isle of Wight. The big question is: which should receive coveted "Isle be back" status? Let's break it down.
SYMBOLS
Isle of Man
Isle of Wight
Who cleans up?
The Isle of Wight symbols are (wait for it) awwight. The Isle of Man, on the other hand, is rocking a coat of arms made up of...legs. Trippy! Plus, the IOM's triskelion looks as fierce as the Glaive from Krull.
NATIVES' NICKNAME
Isle of Man
Manx
Isle of Wight
Caulkheads
Who cleans up?
moving right along . . .
SIGHTSEEING
Isle of Man
Isle of Wight
Similar land and seascapes, and both places have a wide array of castles, amusement parks, shop/dine districts and other attractions to keep your average tourist very busy. If there's one thing that might separate the two isles for traveller purposes, it's that the Isle of Wight is at one of the most southerly and therefore milder parts of the UK, while the Isle of Man is much further up north with higher average rainfall and prevailing winds that give visitors 80's big hair.
which is good
COOLNESS ENHANCER
Isle of Man
The International Isle of Man TT (Tourist Trophy) Race
Isle of Wight
The Isle of Wight Festival
Who cleans up?
I'm neither a follower of motor sports nor a fan of hipster festival-goers, but respect where respect is due: both events have storied histories, are world famous and absolute must-sees within their genres. Still, where the TT Race has long been one of the most prestigious road races in the world and spawned cool video games and a badass 3D/Imax movie, the Isle of Wight Festival has gone from once epically hosting Hendrix and The Who to now featuring Big Brother contestants getting booed off stage.
GEEK CHIC-INESS
Isle of Man
Two words: Space. Travel.
Who cleans up?
Well obviously, this would be the one area where the two British isles should be made to work together rather than against each other.
Obviously
"BEACHES"
Isle of Man
Isle of Wight
Who cleans up?
This is my Boracay pride and prejudice talking, but I utterly refuse to call a British shore a "beach" whenever its "sand" is the size of driveway gravel. Surely there must be some EU regulation or ISO standard mandating proper name use of any seaside that you can't walk on barefoot without going "ow....ow....ow....ow." These places are beaches the same way Tagaytay Highlands is in Scotland.
Maniwala ka sa akin anak, HINDI GANYAN ANG BEACH!
WATER WACKINESS
Isle of Man
Tin Bath Championships
Isle of Wight
Aquaboats for three-year olds
Who cleans up?
Tin Bath Championships look like great fun and would make a great name for a rock band. On the other hand, like videos of squirrels water-skiing, the LLDD-Baby doing water donuts is something I could watch for hours on end with a grin on my face. We're all winners here.
Or maybe I'm just in (wait for it) den-Isle.
Or maybe I'm just in (wait for it) den-Isle.
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